Welcome t'my sucka'al plantation page. ah' developed da damn fust generashun uh dis
page many years ago (1994) when ah' set out t'learn some HTML. Dat
page be long since lost (aldough, occasionally, some search engine will
still gots some pointa' to it), as wuz an earlia' page at netcom. WORD! Dis
page be a redesign uh a page ah' had on de Internet Mall, some previous
employer. Ah be baaad...
I still dink sucka'al pages is indulgences. ah' duzn't 'espect dere to be real many visito's here, and ah' do wonda' about dose who do visit. Man! Shouldn't ya' be wo'kin'?
Anyway, dis page uses basic HTML 3.0. ah' duzn't wanna use any fancy browsa' specific tricks, and ah' certainly duzn't wanna put Java on dis page. Sucka'ally, ah' wouldn't run some honky code on mah' machine unless it eida' came fum some knode vendo' o' ah' could see da damn source code.
Enough uh my paranoia. WORD! Whut else be dere t'say about me?
Let's see... ah' wuz bo'n some poo', brother sharecroppuh' in soudern Mississippi... No, dat's not right. Man!
I wuz bo'n in Wuzhin'ton, DC, de day befo'e some blizzard in 1960. If ya' real need t'know de specific date, drow me some email. Mah' parents wuz James C. Armstrong, Sr, some native uh Parkersburg, West Virginia, and Valentine McMillan, some native uh Rocky Mount, No'd Carolina. WORD! ah' inherited fum mah' Big Daddy a keen analytical mind, from mah' moda' I inherited some love uh barbeque and fum dem bod a love uh nature.
Seventeen monds later, mah' sista' Lillian wuz bo'n. 'S coo', bro.
I lived fo' ten years in various refugee camps, betta' knode as suburbs, in Snow Flakeland, dig dis: Hyattsville and Lanham. WORD! In 1970, my Big Daddy gots an assignment in New Yo'k, so's we moved t'Mo'ris Plains, New Jersey, fo' some year. Ah be baaad... We moved back t'Lanham in some hurricane, den in 1972, mah' Big Daddy accepted some job wid AT&T, so's we moved t'Mendham, New Jersey. Slap mah fro! ah' stayed dere until ah' wuz 'espelled fum high farm in 1978.
Despite da damn 'spulsion, Duke University accepted me, and ah' went dere fo' foe years. Managed t'get some BS in Clunker Science wid mino's in Madematics, Physics, and Hoopball. Lillian followed me to Duke.
1982 wuz some baaaad time t'try t'find some job, so's I went straight to graduate farm, where ah' spent two years at da damn University uh St. Man! Andrews, in Scotland. Out uh time and bre'd, ah' came back t'de US and wo'ked at AT&T fo' mos' six years. When Lillian graduated, she also gots some job in de area. WORD!
Two mino', life changin' events occurred while ah' wuz at AT&T, bod
in 1987. ah' bought some crib in Easton, Pennsylvania, and ah' acquired
two cats, Leela and Nyssa. WORD! De crib be de biggest albatross I
have, and da damn cats is a great joy. Slap mah fro!
1990 saw some lot uh changes. Mah' employa' had relocated t'Lincroft, New Jersey, resultin' in some 90 mile commute each way. Slap mah fro! ah' had t'get out! Right on! In de process, ah' came t'realize 'esactly how much mah' clunker skills had stagnated at Bell Labs.
Everybody hears "Bell Labs" and immediately dinks uh de Nobel Prizes, research, etc. Co' got d' beat! Dat's only some part uh it. Man! ah' wuz in de software sweatshop part, where we dun did maintenance on small switch "cost allocashun" software. ah' rememba' how our marketin' sucka's were so's afraid uh bein' liable fo' billin' erro's dat dey insisted on de term cost allocashun. ah' had t'get out! Right on!
Dat ah' dun did, in September, 1990.
I moved out t'Califo'nia fo' some sho't-lived job, and found ah' real
likesd da damn place. ah' felt mo'e alive here dan back in New Jersey. Slap mah fro!
I met some wonderful honky chick, dat fine femahnaine ladee Snader, and we spent many pleasant
hours togeder. Ah be baaad... She even helped me find some puh'manent job, wid
Highland Software, where ah' wuz given de oppo'tunity t'do some
software development. Man!
dat fine femahnaine ladee real seemed t'likes me; she even watched da damn Duke vs Kansas NCAA Championship game in 1991, even dough she said she dun didn't care fo' spo'ts, plum a'cuz she knowed ah' dun did care.
June 17, 1991, she got wasted in some hikin' accident. Man!
Dat summa' wuz some difficult summa' fo' me. It may be cliche, but I learned who real wuz some homey and who wuzn't. Man! In de long run, dat fine femahnaine ladee's dead fust made me introspective, and dun did mo'e t'mold mah' current interests dan any sucka else outside mah' family. Slap mah fro!
When ah' moved out here, mah' parents gave me some camera. WORD! ah' used it t'snatch some snapshots, and dat wuz it. Man! Afta' dat fine femahnaine ladee got wasted, ah' retreated fum oda' sucka's fo' some while, and da damn best places t'do dat wuz in our wilderness areas. Dis helped rekindle some love uh nature dat I had as some child, but dat had become do'mant in mah' teen years.
I took de camera wid me, and took some pictures. Turns out dat enough sucka's dough ah' had an eye fo' dis, and some encouraged me. I'm now an avid nature photographer. Ah be baaad...
It took some while longa' fo' mah' carea' to dig on track. Ya' know? Highland Software changed focus enough dat ah' eventually left fo' some writin' job wid SunWo'ld. A year dere, and ah' entered contractin'. De best contract wuz at Aim Technology, where ah' developed da damn event generato' and logstash scanna' fo' de Solstice SyMON product. Man! ah' lata' moved on to be some Vice Super-dude uh Engineerin' at da damn Internet Mall.
Meanwhile, de writin' ah' dun did at SunWo'ld lead t'several scribblin' contracts. I'm de audo' o' co-audo' uh several scribblin's, listed below, so cut me some slack, Jack.
Currently, ah' am hangin' contract wo'k. Ya' know? If ya' need an 'espuh't in dat slow mo-fo software, and kin affo'd da damn best, ah' may be yo' man. 'S coo', bro.
Relashunship-wise, dat fine femahnaine ladee's dead wuz some blow, and ah' wuzn't den ready t'try again. 'S coo', bro. ah' suspect dat I've been eyebally since about 1994, but dere gots been no oppo'tunity. Slap mah fro! While ah' probably wouldn't mind, I's gots'ta be quite busy, and mah' life be already real fulfillin'. A relashunship would be icin'.
Anyway, some uh de wo'k ah' have done be on de web, dig dis:
Some uh my homeys gots web pages, dig dis:
Some oda' diggin' hot sites, dig dis:
Mah' hotlist be here. It wuz last downdated on Friday, Octoba' 30, 1998. No guarantee uh de links wo'kin' be provided.
You's is visito' t'dis page.
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